This is satire, right? Poe's law in full effect

[hsilman]

https://startingstrength.com/training/m ... -snowflake

[mgil]

I skimmed that last night.

Same narrative as usual.

[hsilman]

I skimmed that last night.

Same narrative as usual.

I started lifting weights in 2011. I found SS shortly thereafter, did my novice LP, felt superior to the guy deadlifting 600# for reps, bouncing with bad posture. Or the guy push pressing 2 plates for reps,cause it wasn't full ROM or something. I knew better, even though I struggled squatting 275. I get feeling that way.

But SS forums made me humble. People knew way more than me. Rippetoe didn't care about your opinion untill you pull 500. It was all, how do I get this novice shit over and start the real grind? All about fixing beginner mistakes.

What the hell is this new "you did SS so now you're the gym Ubermensch" shit? And not just some shmuck kid on the forum, but an article posted on the site by a SSC(TM).

What happened?

[Manveer]

Are there any SSCs who received the credential before finishing the novice LP? Guessing the answer is "yes".

[cwd]

I had that sort of "chosen tribe" evangelical fever for months after starting lifting a few years ago.

It's a magical thing, that conversion from sedentary and weak to lifting and much stronger. You want everyone else to have this wonderful new thing. I became quite obnoxious at family get-togethers.

A lot of you guys started lifting in your teens and have been more-or-less strong all your lives, and don't realize how intense the transition can be as an adult.

Anyway, that SS essay speaks to me, in a way that makes me cringe a little bit now.

[GregoryDomnin]

Are there any SSCs who received the credential before finishing the novice LP? Guessing the answer is "yes".

They have said that is the case.

[Idlehands]

Are there any SSCs who received the credential before finishing the novice LP? Guessing the answer is "yes".

They have said that is the case.

Does rip ever say anyone finished novice LP correctly?
Nobody does it right. and texas method is only good for one teenager for 1 year if they eat the right food.

Not sure I ever really did the program except for when I was building back after an injury or something. Low bar at the time allowed me to squat in the morning again, back then my back and high bar were like NOPE. so that's a win, for reading the blue book.

I'm dazed where was I going with this?

[Savs]

Same arrogance, close-mindedness, and bigotry as usual.

FTFY

[mgil]

Same arrogance, close-mindedness, and bigotry as usual.

FTFY

Well, there's not only that, but have you noticed that the editorial voice often comes through on many/most of articles posted there?

There is something to be said about a place like T-Nation where the articles are barely touched up and posted. I doubt that the SSCs have a writing voice that is so eerily similar to each other.

[Hanley]

A narrator using second person is always kinda weird. But fun. I think we should do a Part II of this article...choose your own adventure style.

"You now have really big, meaty balls. What will you do with those balls?"

- if you choose to tea-bag your neighbor while his wife is out, turn to page 4.

- if you choose to run for Governor of your state as the Tea Party candidate (you can tea-bag your campaign manager), turn to page 6

- if you choose to tea-bag Eric Cressey, because you know more than him, turn to page 8

- if you choose to use your big, meaty balls to fuel your claim that the "sun is really really really mongo big and therefore solely responsible for climate change" turn to page 10

[Root]

Kinda reminds me of the famous quote by the legend. You know the one.

[shaymus]

Do they still endorse eating a tray of brownies to get through your sticking points or nah?

[Hanley]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_W-fIn2QZgg

[Root]

This one:

“You embrace the fear. You love it when it feels heavy. You hate variety. You think people who make up bullshit excuses to justify their desire to do something easier are just scared, and you are not one of them. You are a lifter, and you lift heavy things. When you walk into the gym, you look around at all the bros doing arm work and five different chest exercises, and you smile because you know they don't know what you know. Or, maybe they do, but they don't have the balls to stay the course, put more weight on the bar and squat something they're afraid they can't squat. But you do that. You do that three days a week. You face your fear over and over and over. And sometimes you fail. Sometimes you can't get another rep. But you show up for your next session, and you try again. You stick to your plan. You learn how to fail. You learn how to try again. You learn that it won't kill you. And because you learned that, when life kicks you in the nuts, when your dog dies or your girlfriend dumps you or boss fires you, you can handle it. You can face it and feel it and know that you will get past it. And that, my friend, is more important than how much weight is on the bar. It's supposed to feel heavy. You're supposed to be scared. If you're not, you're not living.” - Paul Horn

Can't have a strength-related soliloquy without at least one reference to the male gonads, apparently.

[Les]

I skimmed that last night.

Same narrative as usual.

I started lifting weights in 2011. I found SS shortly thereafter, did my novice LP, felt superior to the guy deadlifting 600# for reps, bouncing with bad posture. Or the guy push pressing 2 plates for reps,cause it wasn't full ROM or something. I knew better, even though I struggled squatting 275. I get feeling that way.

But SS forums made me humble. People knew way more than me. Rippetoe didn't care about your opinion untill you pull 500. It was all, how do I get this novice shit over and start the real grind? All about fixing beginner mistakes.

What the hell is this new "you did SS so now you're the gym Ubermensch" shit? And not just some shmuck kid on the forum, but an article posted on the site by a SSC(TM).

What happened?

I sort of felt some odd Heinlein vibe reading that article. The chosen Ubermensch fighting against the gym bros and other "weaklings" in the office.

Full disclosure, I never did the program as written. I actually found a Hepburn program and was running that a few weeks before I found the SS forum. I bought the books (the 3 pack) and got started on them. I didn't want to program jump, so I stuck with my own version of LP until it finally plateaued. After that I went to a TM upper/lower split. Back then no one was running splits. PPST2 only really had one example of a split in it.

I never felt superior to anyone else. Sure I wasn't a fan of quarter squats, etc. but if someone was running a different style of programming and getting good results, I didn't think my way was better. I was exposed to some monster lifters pretty early on though. Most of them were geared powerlifters around the Chicago area. It puts things into perspective when you see a guy bench 1,000# in person.

I tried a little geared powerlifting and preferred raw and stuck with that. But having worn a bench shirt, I know how much that shit hurts!

[mbasic]

“You embrace the fear. You love it when it feels heavy. You hate variety. You think people who make up bullshit excuses to justify their desire to do something easier are just scared, and you are not one of them. You are a lifter, and you lift heavy things. When you walk into the gym, you look around at all the bros doing arm work and five different chest exercises, and you smile because you know they don't know what you know. Or, maybe they do, but they don't have the balls to stay the course, put more weight on the bar and squat something they're afraid they can't squat. But you do that. You do that three days a week. You face your fear over and over and over. And sometimes you fail. Sometimes you can't get another rep. But you show up for your next session, and you try again. You stick to your plan. You learn how to fail. You learn how to try again. You learn that it won't kill you. And because you learned that, when you put out some controversial content on your forum site and some strange ways of doing the lifts on youtube, and then people come at you with good arguments, and start not agreeing with you about everything, you freak out and start doxxing people and deleting posts and posters all over the place. And that, my friend, is more important than how much weight is on the bar. It's supposed to feel heavy. You're supposed to be scared. If you're not, you're not living.” - Paul Horn
.

[mgil]

Eureka!

It's that single punch line pivot...

This time, you did something different – you potato'd.

But your potato does not come off...

[Murelli]

A narrator using second person is always kinda weird. But fun. I think we should do a Part II of this article...choose your own adventure style.

"You now have really big, meaty balls. What will you do with those balls?"

- if you choose to tea-bag your neighbor while his wife is out, turn to page 4.

- if you choose to run for Governor of your state as the Tea Party candidate (you can tea-bag your campaign manager), turn to page 6

- if you choose to tea-bag Eric Cressey, because you know more than him, turn to page 8

- if you choose to use your big, meaty balls to fuel your claim that the "sun is really really really mongo big and therefore solely responsible for climate change" turn to page 10

What if I decide to have steel balls?

[CoconutChris]

A narrator using second person is always kinda weird. But fun. I think we should do a Part II of this article...choose your own adventure style.

"You now have really big, meaty balls. What will you do with those balls?"

- if you choose to tea-bag your neighbor while his wife is out, turn to page 4.

- if you choose to run for Governor of your state as the Tea Party candidate (you can tea-bag your campaign manager), turn to page 6

- if you choose to tea-bag Eric Cressey, because you know more than him, turn to page 8

- if you choose to use your big, meaty balls to fuel your claim that the "sun is really really really mongo big and therefore solely responsible for climate change" turn to page 10

What if I decide to have steel balls?

Skip to page 14, where your lifestyle is all steel. You attend Greysteel Strength and Conditioning because of the name. SSD urges you to buy a suit, so you go to a nearby shop to buy a steel wool suit. A little kid playing with magnets at the shop suddenly screeches across the floor, finally clanging against your ballz. Lil brat starts crying, and everyone in the store cranes their neck to give you a disapproving look. What do you do now?

[cwd]

Skip to page 14, where your lifestyle is all steel. You attend Greysteel Strength and Conditioning because of the name. SSD urges you to buy a suit, so you go to a nearby shop to buy a steel wool suit. A little kid playing with magnets at the shop suddenly screeches across the floor, finally clanging against your ballz. Lil brat starts crying, and everyone in the store cranes their neck to give you a disapproving look. What do you do now?

Teach the kid to squat, press, and deadlift. This will toughen up (his balls/her ovaries), and (s)he will no longer cry in public.